The Caffeinated Penguin

musings of a crackpot hacker

Christmas Miracle

Posted By on December 23, 2010

So, I’m driving to work this morning, and bang a right heading down Eastline towards work.

The car in front of me slows. There is a dog in the other lane. Beautiful all white American Bulldog. Just hanging out, sniffing the breeze. The car in front of me carefully goes around the dog, and continues on.

I stop, and lean on the horn.

There is an oncoming car.

I’m still on the horn.

The car is still coming.

The car hits the dog. The dog goes under, yelps, whines. At least the front wheel goes over the dog – the back one might have too, I didn’t see.

The car continues on.

I pull over, expecting to pull the crash blanket, bundle the dog, and rush him to the vet that’s a mile up the street.

Except there is no dog.

I ask the lady who pulled over behind me where the dog went.

It went towards the house. I can hear the lady telling her dogs to come in.

I go up the drive and tell her that her white dog was just hit by a car. She looks surprised. Through the glass door, I see the dog, barking and jumping, because there are people in her yard.

The dog’s owner looks like she doesn’t believe me, but the other lady has followed me and corroborates my story.

There are three possible explanations for this:

  1. That is one tough dog.
  2. Saturns have no mass.
  3. Christmas miracle.

Now, there is some credence to the low-mass Saturn theory. The car in question was a mid ’90’s Saturn, of the SL2 type, maroon in color. The listed curb weight for the car is 2440 lbs – a full 400lbs lighter than my Golf, which is actually a smaller car.. and it had serious rust problems, so it’s likely lighter than that 2440 at this point.

However, I’m going on Christmas miracle.

Oh, and regarding the other driver.

Physics dictates to me that there’s no way he was going 55 when he hit the dog. However, there was no squeal of tires, and I didn’t see the nose on the car drop. Maybe you didn’t see the dog. Inattentiveness, I can forgive. Maybe your brakes were crap. Poor vehicle maintenance, I can forgive.

But you didn’t stop. You kept driving.

Mister Maroon Saturn, I hope you die cold and alone, unloved and empty.

For everyone else, hug your loved ones. Let them know how much you love them. Play fetch with your doggies, snuggle with your kitties, and have a Merry Christmas.


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